It’s starting again. I can feel it creeping up on me. The doubt.
Depression is a friend of mine. It comes and goes in my life.I know when it is here. I can sometimes fake it. Somtimes not.
I want to join in.
I feel like I’m standing at the edge of the playground and the other kids are playing and laughing and talking. They are all bright and lively. I am standing on the edge, heavy and dark and lifeless. I take one step ahead and then draw back with two steps. I’m further away than I was to begin with.
I KNOW the depression is waiting for me.
I hardly leave my house. I have a million excuses to stay here. Safe and shielded.
And it’s lonely in here.